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I started a relationship series last week talking about how not to be a nice guy and why girls don’t like nice guys. I used the case-study of Rico to explain it. To read it click here:

#BBnaija Housemates Relationship Series: The nice guy. (RICO)

In today’s post, we are going to examine 5 ways to lose your man following the Cee C example. A lot of ladies are single and heartbroken. They wonder without end why they can’t find a man that would stay with them.

In their heads, they have given their all but it seem’s like the more they try the worse things get. if you are a young lady who has seen a continuous pattern of men leaving you, then this post of for you.

The Cee C Example

 

Being Insecure:

The term insecurity is one of the most misconstrued words among young people in today’s world. Everyone is so quick to accuse other people of being insecure which is ironic as a large majority of people are actually very insecure. Cee C is a perfect example of this as she always accused Nina of being insecure. She is uncomfortable with Tobi talking to other people and she always feels like the whole world is against her.

Insecure people feed off other people’s weaknesses as a means to help their damaged Ego. They find joy in constant reassurance from their partners and this can be very very draining.

Cee C

They are also very jealous people and can be very untrusting. As a result, they prevent the person they are involved with from having meaningful relationships with other people.

Tobi was plagued with constantly apologizing and praising her and eventually he got mentally and emotionally drained and left.

Emotionally Abusive:

The world is such a tough place and as a result, we all want to have that person that we consider as home. We want to have that person that brings us joy and makes us feel free. No man wants a woman that he comes home to and starts unnecessary drama. He has had a long day, he’s faced stress from his workplace and customers degrading him. What he wants from his woman is peace, love, and reassurance. So what now happens when he gets home and with all that he has been through throughout the day only for his wife to starts making him feels worthless and bring him down with words. It would be a disaster.

Cee C

It can greatly scar his self-esteem and in the long run, lead to unhappiness and depression. Tobi and Cee C are playing a game in the big brother Naija house. There is enough drama and pressure coming from the other competitors and all Tobi needed from Cee C was love, peace and support and all she gave him was the opposite. Due to true love, he greatly tolerated her but it eventually didn’t work out as he had enough and had an emotional burst out. It’s no wonder that though he still clearly cares for her, he is trying his best to avoid her as he is seeking for peace and sanity.

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Dear Woman, never ever be a source of constant pain to your man, else he will leave you eventually. What he needs are support and peace and you will see that he will never be far away from you.

Disrespectful:

Every man craves to feel like a man with his woman. He wants her to make him feel needed and appreciated. He wants a woman that places huge importance on his words and keeps his advice. He doesn’t want a woman that undermines his intelligence or a woman that belittles his relevance.

Let’s face it, the feminist movement is great. I am a proud feminist as I believe a woman has the right to be and do all that she wants to be or do. But in the context of a relationship, a man is the head. If you have a problem with this, then you will have a problem with keeping your man. You need to be genuinely cool with him having the final say and taking a stand.

Cee C

If you are the type to always challenge his authority you both would have a problem. If you always act better than him and higher than him maybe due to your earning and exposure, then you both would definitely have problems.

We all know Cee C never lets Tobi forget that she’s older than him. She basically utilizies every opportunity she gets to let him know that she’s his senior. She always acts like his opinions are irrelevant and bringing him down constantly was her hobby. Eventually, he couldn’t take it and left her.

Sexual Tease:

Every guy secretly craves for a good girl who is bad for only him. As much as this sounds like a cliche it is the truth as sexual fulfiilment is one of the neccesary ingredients for a bloosming relationship.

Amazingly, Tobi never demanded to have sex with Cee C all he wanted was a simple kiss and they both knew that they cared about each other and were building something strong. But rather than coming right out and stating that you don’t want to start a relationship with him, you lead him on with body language but make him look stupid when he tries to kiss you.

Tobi got bored of it and decided to move on. She later got the memo and kissed him in the store room and we could see a clear boost in thier realtionship but still, her other attitudes pushed him away.

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Cee C

Tobi clearly respected her as even in the midst of their kisses he never touched her in intimate places. If you compare their relationship with the others going sronger in the big brother Naija house you would realize that all other housemates romantically involved have had some level of intimacy.

What would have been preferable and respectable was that she came out straight and said she never wanted to be physical with him. But playing around and teasing and kissing and stopping is a tiring mind game. Men love women that take pride in dignity but also do not act like physical intimacy is a payment for something because it really isn’t.

Its supposed to be something special to be shared with two people who care about one another. Whether in marriage or in a relationship depending on the beliefs of the people involved. But what is important is being direct on your stand on the issue. You do this or you don’t. You want this or you don’t simple.

Not Trustworthy:

One of the quickest way to accelerate the end of a relationship is to betray trust of your partner. Trust like a glass once broken, putting it back would never be the same.

Men want a woman they are confident in. They want someone that they are sure has their best interst at heart. They don’t want you saying something today and tomorrow they hear another thing.

They want to listen to you talk and not doubt the credibility of your words. They also can’t be with someone they are scared might ruin thier lives or career by betryaing them.

Let’s face it, we all know from close examination of Cee C and her actions that she has clearly not shown herself to be trustwrthy to Tobi. From wrongly accusing him of things, to saying things and lying about saying them, Cee C has pretty much been plagued by inconsistency in words.

This is not to say that she’s a bad person but she seems to be highly emotional and as a result allows her emotions to make her do or say things she later regrets.

I hope you have been able to learn one or two things from this article. Cee C is not a horrible person and just like us all she just has a lot of leaning to do. Please share with the share buttons for the benefit of others. Till the next one.

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Agboola Faith Moyosore is a purposeful storyteller, written and performance poet, and youth development speaker. She is passionate about youth affairs, relationship talk, and business growth. She's reachable on @faithmoyosore on all platforms.